Lonely, Like a Kite
The other day a friend of mine mentioned that she felt like a kite floating on the wind, scared and lonely. That image has marked itself in my brain and taken on a life of its own.
There are different ways to be in the air. Birds fly through the air, moving of their own accord. Airplanes are flown by people, and their passengers trust the pilots, the mechanics and physics of flying as they move from one destination to the next. Kites are tethered to people on the ground, their movement dependent on the wind current and the length of string. When there is no wind to support them, they fall.
Angels are pure energy, and though often depicted with wings, their “movement” is 100% based on intention. Since I work with angels daily, invoking their presence for help and protection, I can usually sense their presence quite quickly. Because of this, I rarely feel alone or lonely.
I do have moments when I feel lonely, though, and it’s usually when I’m around other people. I think working with angels is really cool and I get pretty enthusiastic about it, but as it turns out, there are a number of people who think it’s kind of weird. They are actually right - it is kind of weird, but also cool, comforting, and helpful. Most of the time I don’t care what people think about me. It’s none of my business.
When my friends and family who are still around find me to be a bit much, that’s when I feel lonely like a kite. The string goes from my heart and soul to somewhere in the past. Whether it's a place where I was less my authentic self, or a belief that I have to act a certain way or believe certain things to feel safe, worthy, and enough, the feeling is somewhat paralyzing. My throat feels tight. My chest hurts, and I feel like running, crying, or taking a nap to make it go away. I question myself a lot.
What is the angelic suggestion to overcoming this age-old feeling of loneliness? The angels suggest starting with the feeling - not the “I feel sad. I feel lonely.”, but the my heart is heavy, my gut unsteady, and my throat feels like it’s closing up -feeling. Become aware of how your body is processing what is going on. Notice when you think particular thoughts which area of your body reacts, and then send that part love. For example, when I feel rejected because of my exuberance, my throat feels tight. When I imagine sending my throat love and acceptance, that tight-feeling starts to release. When I feel sad because my family is all agreeing on something that I don’t agree with, my heart hurts. When I imagine sending love and compassion to my heart, the pain in my heart starts to dissipate. This process takes some getting used to, but can be very rewarding, helping us to get the love that we need and dispel the feeling of being like a kite, tethered to other people’s thoughts/feelings/judgments…or what we perceive as other people’s thoughts/feelings/judgments. By imagining giving our self the very thing that we need most: LOVE (compassion, acceptance, worthiness), our soul accepts it as the real thing and the loneliness starts to fade.
