What Is My Purpose?
To be human is to ask, “What is my purpose?”or “Why am I here?”. The message is different for each of us and also the same for all of us. How can this even make sense?
The easier question to answer is the one that’s for all of us. We are here to love more fully and more deeply our own existence and the existence of all life around us! And now that I’ve dropped that major news on your lap…I’m going to go make a snack and we can all digest the enormity of this concept for the rest of the month. Even for the most loving people among us, this is a gargantuan task.
Starting with loving ourselves - why is this the absolute hardest? Our self-talk can be utterly destructive. From an early age we learn to berate ourselves. Sometimes it’s self-deprecating humor, and sometimes there’s nothing funny about it. We have a way of taking the meanest things said to us, making them worse and then flogging ourselves within an inch of our very life. I remember laughing as a teen at the SNL skit with Al Franken , Stuart Smalley, I think? He was my introduction to affirmations: “I’m good enough. I’m smart enough. And doggone it, people like me!” Like all good humor, there was an element of truth in it. Affirmations are great, but what makes them magical is the ability to imagine the feeling behind them. I only vaguely remember the skit, but I do know that learning to really love ourselves takes some more work than repeating affirmations. We need to be able to imagine what loving ourselves truly would feel like. Sometimes that takes clearing out some old habits and beliefs. Sometimes those old habits and beliefs are so deeply hidden within us, that it takes a while to clear it out. I know, for me, hundreds of journal entries, meditations, self-reiki, and going to others for clearings and healings have done a good job of clearing out the top layers. I know that I may never fully be done. However, I can look in the mirror and tell myself I love me without looking away, or laughing, or crying anymore. I have learned to give myself grace. I have said the Ho’oponopono Prayer (I’m sorry, Please forgive me, Thank you, I love you) over and over and over to help forgive myself for all the times I didn’t measure up to my own standards. Learning to love ourselves first, most, and best is the key to learning how to love the earth and everything and everyone on it.
How? But seriously….HOW? How are we supposed to do this?
I think a good first step is realizing when you’re treating yourself like dirt. A couple years ago I discovered cool, young, angel medium from Scotland with the darn-cutest accent I’d ever heard. I like angels, so I decided to purchase a deck of his angel oracle cards and began doing readings for myself. One card that came up often for me was, Clear, Cancel, and Release. Kyle Gray and the angels were teaching me to love myself by noticing every time that I said something that wasn’t nice about myself to clear, cancel, and release it. It was the ultimate do-over! Eventually, I quit saying mean things about me. This didn’t mean that I automatically loved myself, but it was a good first step. And you know what else? I found that the more grace I gave myself, the more grace that I gave others! It certainly made that biblical saying I grew up with, “do unto others as you would have them do unto you” make more sense, along with more modern wisdom: “we teach people how to treat us by how we treat ourselves” make sense. (If anyone can think of a good song mash up that ties these two thoughts into one, I would love to hear it in the comments!) Ultimately, we have to love ourselves: treat ourselves with dignity, kindness, and compassion in order to have others treat us that way….AND, when we treat ourselves with love, respect, and kindness, we are much more likely to treat others that way!
I feel like this blog is getting a bit word-y, so I’ll wrap it up as quick as I can.
It doesn’t matter what you do during this lifetime. Your job is not your purpose. Life on earth would not work if everyone had the same job. We need people filling a plethora of different occupations, so don’t go quitting your job to live in a cave in Tibet and meditate until you completely love yourself. We have to learn these lessons right where we are and spread the love through our interactions. We start by loving ourselves, and we let that grow. We have more grace and understanding for the people we live with. We have a little less road rage for the slow driver in the fast lane. We let our lawns grow longer and encourage pollinators to thrive by not destroying their habitat. We notice one another - looking up from our phones to make eye contact. We realize that everyone is doing the best that they can with what they know. Our purpose is to live in harmony from where we are, realizing that we are all connected. We are all one. When one of us is hurting, we all are hurting. The very first person we can help is the person in the mirror who hurts. Love that person. Treat them with the kindness you would show for a baby or a puppy, who can’t talk back, but who can see your light and love you unconditionally. It was explained to me once that Angels see us that way - our love light shining, no matter what we do. They want to teach us to see ourselves that way. Clear, cancel,and release anything the angels would never say to you. It’s a good start.
Peace and light,
Margaret Rose
651.442.3732
peacefulsoulutions.net
